Four of These Things are Not Like the Others

While in Myrtle Beach, SC this weekend, me a some friends see this bar, a biker bar no less, called Suck Bang Blow. Well, with a name like that, you know the curiosity will get the better of 4 single girls on a trip to the beach, and we all decide we just have to have a tshirt! So, what’s the first thing we do Saturday venturing out into the very rainy day? Well, we stop by, of course! I’ll set the scene for you so you can enjoy the situation just as much as we did:

The bar, a hole in the wall kind of establishment as one would imagine, was situated perfectly between The Beaver Bar on the left, and the Pink Pony on the right – so in order it went The Beaver Bar, Suck Bang Blow, Pink Pony. I just wonder what Freud would have had to say about that? We pull into the parking lot full of macho, chromed-out Harleys in my friend’s rental gold 4-door Taurus (dubbed the Taurcedes for the weekend because it was such a pimp mobile). There are several sketchy-looking leather-clad men with bandanas sitting out under the overhang of the exterior of the bar, staring at us, most likely for any number of reasons – 1) we were in a car at a biker bar and took up 2 biker spaces in order to park 2) It was pouring down rain, so once parked we all just sat in the car laughing hysterically and waiting for the rain to die down before jumping out (and maybe we were trying to work up the nerve to actually go in, too) and 3) We had Gwen Stefani’s B.A.N.A.N.A.S song blarring on the radio – I’m sure a real hit with this rough and ready crowd, although I didn’t really see any of them bust a move. We give up waiting for the rain, take a deep breath, and make a run for the door. Here we go be-boppin' in the place, 2 friends dressed in J.Crew and Ann Taylor shorts and tanktops, one friend in a cute skirt and tshirt with a cartoon girl on it, and me in my black capris and shirt with a cute little bow on the left shoulder. We looked like the Junior League coming to sell raffle tickets for a bake sale or something. Inside there were more bikers, bikes, beer signs, broken chairs, pool & pingpong tables, and a confederate flag with the words "I ain't coming down" printed on it. We sheepishly made our way to the store, searched for shirts and each made a purchase. After deciding against the ones that said "Biker's Week Thaaaat's Right" and "Suck Blow Bang," I did decide on this one - which I'll probably only ever wear for really important events like Easter Sunday at church, first dates with guys that I really want to impress, or when going to meet a guy's family for the first time.


(Back logo - sorry the image sucks, but have you ever tried to scan in a tshirt? It says Suck Bang Blow Bikers Blow-out Bar Murrell's Inlet, SC)
On the way out, we had to pass through a group of bikers blocking our way through the doors. Apparently they liked our squeaky clean June Cleaver look because they kept asking why we were leaving so soon and would we be coming back. As much as I would have loved to have gone back to buy the denim Suck Bang Blow overalls (available for purchase from their website if you're interested) and enjoy a tall glass of moonshine, um, that'd be a big fat negative. "Thaaaat's right."