Ah Spring - Where Everything is...Yellow

Aack! Cough! Wheez!
For those unaware of the whole pollen situation here in the South, let me explain - although even the best of explanations will never do the actual experience any justice, whatsoever.
So let's start with just exactly what a pollen count is. Well boys and girls, this is the amount of pollen particles measured in the last 24 hours in a cubic meter of air (how would you like that job?). Anything over120 is what they like to call "extremely high". Well, 4,000 is the pollen count today! You saw correctly, and no, those aren't extra zeros. The pollen count is 33% higher then the "extremely high" count!?(who knew I could do math? Wait, before I get too proud, is that even right?) Everything here is absolutely covered in a bright yellow dust. Red cars look orange. When you breath, you feel the fine yellow pollen dust infiltrating your lungs. A cloud of yellow dust kicks up from car tires as they pass down the street. You can even see your shoe print in the layer of yellow dust on your front porch (or front stoop as Northerners like to call it, and no, I don't have a hound dog with a rope tied to it's collar laying outside my front door). The landscape and the weather are beautiful, but it's a complete tease because no one wants to spend time outside breathing in the pollen. You can actually see it hanging in the air. People sneeze, sniffle, cough, and wheez. Eyes water and itch, along with the back of your throat and nose. Everyone is operating on a nice high from an allergy medicine buzz. Oh well, Denver gets a nice dusting of snow in April; the South gets a nice dusting of tree, grass, and ragweed pollen. And even still, there's no where else I'd rather live.