The Big One That Got Inside

While opening the door to let my dog back inside tonight from his last outing before a 1 am bedtime, he bolted inside as usual, and running full speed inside right behind him came a HUGE, black, cockroach. Ugh, I just had a full body shiver just recounting this incident! I mean, this thing was so big, you could saddle it and sell rides at the county fair! Well, great. You know what this means. Kara's not going to bed until I find this thing and kill it. Another key moment in my life when I wish someone else were around. I HATE bugs, especially large, disgusting bugs, and especially when my peace of mind depends on me to kill it! But, with the option of leaving it and going to bed, only to wake up with it ON me somewhere and doing creepy crawly things to me, I was going to track this sucker down and get rid of it before I came anywhere close to shutting my eyes. So, I've spent the last hour tracking it through my house, in my pajamas with bug spray in hand, as if I was on some hunt with the Crocodile Hunter. I came close a few times to killing it, but this thing was so fast it'd give any NASCAR driver a run for his money! And then the unthinkable happened...I saw it run into my room and under my bed. As if it merely being in my house weren't bad enough, but now the monster is under my bed!! I grab a flashlight so I can see where to aim the bug spray, kneel on the hardwoods, slowly lift up the bedskirt and suddenly I'm eye to beety eye with scariest creature on earth under 3 inches. I gasp, my heart beating through my chest, and spray at least half of the bottle of bug spray beneath my bed within a 2 foot radius of where I spotted it. As luck would have it, I succeeded in it's demise. I went to my bathroom, unrolled 3/4 of the roll of toilet paper to pick it up with, and flushed it down the toilet, with an extra flush just for good measure. Whew. I can now go to bed without hesitation knowing that I found and killed it, only the adrenaline's pumping through my body so I'm not even sleepy. He may have been the big one that got inside, but he wasn't the big one that got away!